WHEN CHRISTMAS IS  NOT THE MOST WONDERFUL TIME OF THE YEAR

I love Christmas. And I am immensely blessed to be married to a woman who loves Christmas with me. My two children love Christmas too! My precious little girl loves watching all the Christmas Veggie Tales and my very energetic son waits with great anticipation for our Christmas Eve Worship Gathering at First Christian Church.  Christmas is indeed a joyous time for many. A time to spend with family and friends to celebrate the birth of our Lord Jesus Christ (Luke 2:8-21). It’s a time to gather with God’s people to sing the historic Christmas hymns of our faith that countless Christ followers have sung for centuries; songs like O Holy Night and Hark the Herald Angels Sing. It’s a time for giving, celebrating, and for me it’s a time to enjoy my bride’s wonderful Christmas cookies-there has not been a year that she has let me down!  

        But for some, Christmas is lonely, discouraging, difficult, and even a dreaded time of year. Instead of being the Most Wonderful Time of the Year-It’s the Most Miserable Time of the Year. 

As I write these lines, I think of grieving people who have lost loved ones-maybe a spouse, child, or parent in past years. I think of the single person who is longing to get married and is heartbroken to spend another Christmas alone. I think of the married couple who has prayed, and prayed, and prayed for children to give gifts to on Christmas Day but will spend another Christmas struggling with the deep pain of infertility. All this said, let’s not forget those struggling with a serious illness or those immersed in what seems to be unceasing conflict with family members as they prepare to celebrate the birth of the Prince of Peace (Isaiah 9:6).

So, for those who are struggling during the Christmas season, where should they look in God’s Word for help and hope? Here are some brief but I pray applicable truths for those who might say that Christmas is not the most wonderful time of the year. 

God is With Us

First consider the hope of these three glorious words “God with us” which are found in Matthew 1:23. These words draw us back to an ancient prophecy from Isaiah 7:14 that God made about Christ 700 years before the birth of our Lord Jesus. This a fresh and much needed reminder that our God is faithful to keep His promises. So there is much hope for the discouraged saint as Christmas Day draws closer-God is faithful to keep His promises. And one of the most precious and life changing promises that He makes and will keep to His adopted children is this: He will never leave or forsake them (Heb. 13:5). When the downcast soul during the holiday season meditates on such a promise, hope will abound in great measure.  

He is richly and graciously present with you when you feel overwhelmed and the tears are falling from your eyes uncontrollably.

But let’s look again to those three awesome words in Matthew 1:23-“God with us.” If for you Christmas is difficult and depressing-remember that your Merciful Savior is with you in the midst of your pain and distress. So, if you are plagued with a sense of loneliness during the holiday season, find contentment in this: He is richly and graciously present with you when you feel overwhelmed and the tears are falling from your eyes uncontrollably. The God who spoke the creation into existence by His powerful Word- the beautiful stars above, the sun, the moon, the oceans, the mountains and the snow that falls to blanket the earth- this is the God Who is near you and cares for you-He is your Emmanuel. The God who reigns supremely over all things, Whose glory is unfathomable, and the One whom countless angels ceaselessly worship-this the God Who is present with you and will never let you go (Jude 24) .  What a glorious and unshakable assurance we have because of these rich truths! Dear Friend, stop and consider these truths and let them warm the affections of your heart in the midst of your pain. 

The Gracious Provision of Lament

But second, if you are struggling this Christmas Season, remember the gracious provision of lament. A great resource to read or listen to on audiobook is Mark Vroegop’s timely and amazing book, Dark Clouds, Deep Mercy. In this insightful book, Vroegop defines lament as “a prayer in pain that leads to trust.” I like to refer to it with people I counsel as processing your pain with God at center. Lament is how Christ followers grieve as they process the difficulties of life.  It’s how believers in Jesus praise God through the providential storms that life in a fallen world often brings.

Process your pain with God at the center

A great place to learn about lament is in the Psalms and one particular psalm I would commend to you is Psalm 13. In this Psalm we find a helpful guide on how to lament. We learn to turn to God (v. 1), to bring our complaints before Him (vv. 1-2), to ask boldly (vv. 3-4), and to choose to trust (vv. 5-6). So if dark clouds and storms are on the horizon for your Christmas season-learn the beauty of lament, follow the faithful guide of Psalm 13 and pray through your pain and suffering. Don’t stuff your pain, don’t run from your pain-but instead process your pain with God at center. 

Thrive in Gospel Community

Thirdly and lastly, if Christmas is becoming overwhelming for you, I counsel you to thrive in the Gospel Community. Life in a fallen world is challenging and at times even disillusioning. When the going gets tough and the tough gets rough-we need to engage in one God’s cherished gifts to us-the body of Christ. God has given us the church-the community of redeemed believers in King Jesus-so that we can carry one another’s burdens (Gal. 6:2), care for one another though times of adversity (Prov. 17:17), and encourage one another to stay faithful when the temptation to get hardened hearts in our suffering occurs (Heb. 3:12-13). The great responsibility upon us then is to steward this precious gift of community well.

The great responsibility upon us then is to steward this precious gift of community well.

So, if this Christmas season you find yourself discouraged and downcast-reach out to your brothers and sisters and tell them about the workings of your heart. Pick up that phone and reach out to a friend, contact your small group leader and pray together, and keep being intentional with other Gospel centered Christ followers. We will grow and thrive when we live in a Gospel shaped community! This may not be easy-but remember that our Gracious God often brings healing and hope to the weary soul through His redeemed people as they carefully minister the soothing salve of His sufficient Word to the struggling saint (2 Cor. 1:3-7). In response, the purpose to live a transparent life so that you might thrive in a Gospel shaped community. 

In conclusion, if you catch yourself singing or thinking of Christmas, “It’s the most miserable time of the year”-rest assured dear saint saved by grace that your God is present with you and He will never let you go, find hope through the grace of lament, and pursue Christ Centered Community. Hope, peace, and joy will abound in your life when you do and Christmas may very well become to you once again, the most wonderful time of the year.

~ Pastor Mike DiSanto ~